Poly Friendly Therapy

ONLINE THERAPY FOR ADULTS IN OHIO

Stepping into a new relationship structure can be exciting and exhilarating. It can also overwhelm your ability to cope in ways that are surprising.

Transitioning to polyamory/non-monogamy can be a roller coaster ride - overwhelming emotions and seemingly endless new situations to navigate. You might be having major wounds or insecurities magnified. You’re reading all the books, but it’s hard to get your mind and body on board when you’re faced with new situations or are experiencing your partner dating for the first time. There’s a lot that resonates with you about polyamory/non-monogamy, but you’re not sure if you can make it work for you.

Or, you may have been polyamorous/non-monogamous for a while, and are navigating some new challenges. You may have struggled in the past to find a therapist who is not just affirming, but understands the nuances to polyamory (you don’t want to explain what a polycule or a meta is). Or worse - you’ve worked with therapists who treat polyamory like a deviation from the norm or an unnecessary complication to your relationship.

When anxiety, depression or past trauma is intersecting with turmoil in polyamorous relationships, we can often compound the suckiness by telling ourselves we’re “bad” at being polyamorous.  You don’t have to navigate these struggles alone.


My approach to poly friendly therapy

Using an approach tailored to you, this is what we’re likely to dive into in sessions. We’ll decide together where it makes sense to start.

Your approach to polyamory/non-monogamy and current relationships: We’ll talk about how you approach relationships and dating (solo poly, monogamish,  married and open, relationship anarchist, kitchen table poly, parallel poly and everything in-between). We’ll explore what your current relationships look like and any areas of concern.

Exploring Triggers, Developing Distress Tolerance and Self-Compassion  - We’ll identify what situations/beliefs/triggers tend to activate you the strongest and develop new ways to cope. If you’re feeling “in the weeds” when it comes to managing your emotions or feel overwhelmed with decisions you’re trying to make in your relationships,  we might spend more time here. If you have reliable skills that work for you, we may shift more quickly into exploring what’s going underneath the surface.

Values, Boundaries and Communication - If you’re contemplating polyamory/non-monogamy, just starting out or wanting to make a change, we might start with defining your values and from there helping you identify what relationship structure makes the most sense for you. Maybe some of these scenarios resonate: you don’t know what’s reasonable to request of your partner(s), you feel overwhelmed by meeting the needs of multiple partners, or you know what boundary/need you have but communicating it is a struggle. We can dive into identifying what empowering boundaries look like, and how you can communicate assertively and effectively.


Going Deeper in Healing Past Wounds/Increasing Self-Awareness - Using somatic approaches including EMDR and IFS, we’ll help you understand how past life circumstances are impacting you today, release what your body may be holding from past painful experiences, and help you connect with your body and inner wisdom so you can feel secure and empowered in your relationships.

Methods

Ready to get started?

What we’ll work on

Poly Friendly therapy can help you to:

  • Get clarity on your needs, boundaries, and effective ways to work through distress.

  • Explore fears, concerns, and triggers in a space where you won’t be shamed or judged

  • Increase your self-understanding and self-compassion so you can make empowered decisions and improve your relationships

FAQS

Common questions about Poly and Open Relationship Friendly Therapy

  • The direction your therapy takes will be unique and tailored to you. You might be in a place where you’re ambivalent about being in an open/poly relationship, wondering if your relationship(s) are healthy, or don’t know what approach or style works/makes sense for you, or you’re feeling overwhelmed by what’s surfacing for you. If that’s the case, we may focus more on helping you cultivate clarity around what’s coming up for you and what actions/next steps are in alignment with your values.

    You might be noticing past wounds or fears about relationships being magnified. We can create a space for you to understand how past events may be still impacting you and showing up as problems or conflicts in relationships.

    You might be someone for whom dynamics in their poly/open relationships isn’t the primary reason you’re seeking therapy, but simply want a therapist who understands and is affirming of your relationships.

  • There may be times where we decide together to include your partner(s) in sessions, I do not provide ongoing couples/relationship therapy. My focus is helping you on your individual healing journey - this can look like ongoing individual therapy or some adjunctive sessions to work through something that’s feeling stuck in couples/relationship counseling that may be better served to address in individual therapy. I am happy to provide referrals to couples/relationships therapists and/or work in tandem with a couples/relationship therapist you are working with.

  • Absolutely. Experiencing overwhelming jealousy, concern about how to navigate your parter’s experience of jealousy, is often a big concern in poly/open relationships. It can be confusing to sort out know you need to learn to tolerate/feel the emotions you’re experiencing, while also figuring out when you need to request something from your partner or set a boundary. I find that taking an IFS approach to jealousy can be very valuable -it help us to better understand the parts of us showing up and attune to them in different ways.

  • I am polyamorous and have personal experience with what it’s like to transition to a new relationship structure, making mistakes, and unpacking all the “stuff” that come with it. I also have extensive training as a trauma therapist, and understand how our early experiences with connection and attachment can reverberate into our adult relationships.

    I have done therapy training specific to working with polyamorous folx, enjoy reading about polyamory/non-monogamy, and am always in an ongoing state of learning. I have lived experience being polyamorous, but that doesn’t mean I think how I do things is the gold standard or how you “should” do polyamory. I also believe it’s perfectly valid to decide you want a monogamous relationship. My aim to help guide you to increased clarity and self-understanding so you can make empowered choices and improve your relationships.